Always waiting for something. So, I've decided since a pregnancy is still a possibility, I'm going to go ahead and start tracking my cycles and see how they're working out. It's been a long time since I've even given my cycles a thought, and I'm pretty sure this is only the third one I've had post partum (the fact that I'm not sure lends itself to the reality that I'm going to have to start tracking them). So, overnight Monday into Tuesday I started my new cycle. Not sure if I should call that February 14th or 15th, so I'm going to keep both dates on the books for now and see what next month brings.
In the meantime, I'm still moving ahead with the body challenge. I'm really starting to love the changes I'm seeing, and while staying away from my favorite foods is a chore (to say the least) it gets more and more worth it each passing day. Yes people, that's right, I'm getting hott! (yes the second "T" was necessary). Don't get me wrong, I'm not vain, not in the least, but I have put so much hard work into this so far that not to recognize the amazing things that my body is doing would be doing it a terrible injustice. In 6 weeks (nearly, tomorrow is Day 1 of week 6, so really it's been 5 complete weeks) I have changed a lot of things about my body, I'm thinner, I'm stronger, and I'm an all around healthier person. It feels nice to be able to pull something out of my closet and not have to do the "does this make me look fat from this angle?" dance in the mirror.
It's been a long time since I've been comfortable with my body, and it's a feeling I've long forgotten. Let me say this, it feels amazing. I think that I may just wear a bikini this summer... stetch marks and all... I'm only 25 after all. I won't be able to do that without raising eyebrows for much longer lol. I may pick a "grown up" costume for Halloween this year (assuming I'm not pregnant of course) and flaunt my hard work. You have to understand that my body has never been mine. I have been a parent for most of my life. I was a mom before I was old enough to wear a bikini... so I've never felt comfortable in one. To be in a place where I am embracing my body is a huge step for me. I'm starting to feel beautiful, something I've never felt before. I'm waiting for the day when I can look in the mirror and smile because the woman staring back at me is a peace with herself... not poking love handles and jiggling her belly around. I'm proud of the work that I have done/ am doing, and every day I get closer to being proud of my body in general.
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